It's been a while since I've come out here and put some words to paper. Mainly, because, in my true nature, I take on more activities than I can possibly handle. I have been very busy with the school, home, my SCA group, the kids, etc etc etc....
So, to catch up, to date, I've lost 55 lbs from my surgery weight, and am down 85 lbs from my heaviest weight...which leads to today's theme....Brain, Meet Body.
So, I went shopping today. Doesn't seem like a big deal, right? Well, when you can't stand to see yourself in the mirror, and know that the clothes you are putting on will normally not fit right, show all the fat rolls, and generally even a clearance price will not outweigh the overall hatred you have of how you look in it, it's a dreaded and horrible ordeal.
Even with the weight loss, I still haven't really done much shopping for myself. A few t-shirts for working out at Zumba here and there, but that's been about it. I've been pretty fortunate that a few friends have passed on some clothes to me, and frankly, I've just been making things work.
In a moment of desperation the other day, I borrowed a t-shirt from John - and was completely shocked that it fit. So...when Julie asked me to go to Kohl's with her today to help her pick out a few things, I packed up Alex, and resigned myself that I would force myself to at least try something on - how bad could it be, right? I've lost more weight, maybe it will be better....and I was pleasantly surprised that I was CORRECT!
The first and most important lesson is that I need to reintroduce my brain to my body. My brain still sees my body the way it looked 3 months ago...and that's a problem! It is very hard to choose clothing that fits how I look today!
The second is that it helps to go with someone. Since my brain hasn't caught up to my body, it helps to have someone to be honest and tell me yes or no.
Well, I did better today than I thought I would. I practically did a happy dance in the dressing room when I tried on a pair of size 20 capris and they were TOO BIG and had to go down to a size 18. I picked out a couple of shirts that were cute, Julie helped me eliminate ones that were not flattering, but also helped me pick out one that I thought wouldn't work - and it looked so cute! It was dangerously liberating! I actually, for the first time in many years, had FUN shopping for clothing for myself...and the scary thing....I got Kohls Cash - so I have to go back after the 16th.....YAY!
So, to catch up, to date, I've lost 55 lbs from my surgery weight, and am down 85 lbs from my heaviest weight...which leads to today's theme....Brain, Meet Body.
So, I went shopping today. Doesn't seem like a big deal, right? Well, when you can't stand to see yourself in the mirror, and know that the clothes you are putting on will normally not fit right, show all the fat rolls, and generally even a clearance price will not outweigh the overall hatred you have of how you look in it, it's a dreaded and horrible ordeal.
Even with the weight loss, I still haven't really done much shopping for myself. A few t-shirts for working out at Zumba here and there, but that's been about it. I've been pretty fortunate that a few friends have passed on some clothes to me, and frankly, I've just been making things work.
In a moment of desperation the other day, I borrowed a t-shirt from John - and was completely shocked that it fit. So...when Julie asked me to go to Kohl's with her today to help her pick out a few things, I packed up Alex, and resigned myself that I would force myself to at least try something on - how bad could it be, right? I've lost more weight, maybe it will be better....and I was pleasantly surprised that I was CORRECT!
The first and most important lesson is that I need to reintroduce my brain to my body. My brain still sees my body the way it looked 3 months ago...and that's a problem! It is very hard to choose clothing that fits how I look today!
The second is that it helps to go with someone. Since my brain hasn't caught up to my body, it helps to have someone to be honest and tell me yes or no.
Well, I did better today than I thought I would. I practically did a happy dance in the dressing room when I tried on a pair of size 20 capris and they were TOO BIG and had to go down to a size 18. I picked out a couple of shirts that were cute, Julie helped me eliminate ones that were not flattering, but also helped me pick out one that I thought wouldn't work - and it looked so cute! It was dangerously liberating! I actually, for the first time in many years, had FUN shopping for clothing for myself...and the scary thing....I got Kohls Cash - so I have to go back after the 16th.....YAY!
That is awesome Carol! I am so happy your results are so great! =0)I know what you mean about brain and body. My way of dressing has changed a lot because of the weight and being a stay at home mom. I have 1 par of jeans and 1 pair of dress pants and everything else is basically comfy pants and tops. How is Zumba?
ReplyDeleteI have my surgical consult on June 2 and only have about 5 more weeks to go before I hit the 6 month mark for my insurance visits to be done! Sleep Test done, Psych evaluation done and Pre-Surgical Orientation June 1st.
My friend Andrea just got it done 8 days ago and has lost almost 30lbs and her husband got his about a year ago and has lost almost 120.